Category Archives: Uncategorized

Turn Down the Watts

To the tune of: Turn Down for What

By: DJ Snake, Lil Jon

Raining down from the cloud

Another bill, ever-wowed


Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts


Mother Nature’s juice

Don’t disuse, don’t abuse


Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts


Life electric or off the grid

Demanding a rebid


Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts


Magellanic cloud

Another field needing ploud

TV watchers disavowed

All the circuits overcrowd

Don’t wait, do it now

Shut it on down


Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts

Turn down the watts


For My KSU Homies – And One Special Bride To Be

This goes out to my KSU homies
The school yard kids with the sick dreads
Slinging coffee, playing hacky, picking up those academic creds.

Now let’s throw it back to two thousand and one
Living in a small world, in Apple
And rising with the sun

Packing up that quiet life
In little Fremont
Heading east toward the city
The AK-Ron

Leaving mom, dad, and Jake and the pup
On her way to a voyage
In art, academics, and fun, yes’ sup!

So much opportunity awaited
Little did she know
12 years later in the Falls
still living in the snow.

Working at Ho-oly Family
Slinging paint, throwing clay
Still single though and mom now she thinks she might be gay

But little did LuAnn know
Allison was on a quest
Dating matchless dudes
But searching for the best

Then one day I get a call
About a newby mr Sean
I’m in Lakewood she says
Still not sure if she wants him gone

Come on by I say and let’s have a chat
Just have fun, go play, buy a kitkat
Now fast forward many months and now several years
And here we’re celebrating
Throwing up many cheers

Allison finally found him
The paint to her portrait
The humor to her laugh
The style not corporate

In October they wed
To many in Tremont
With Lots of dancing
And parties and maybe kids is what’s ahead

So here is to you
miss Allison Derr
Much loved much deserved
A toast and a hangover cure

Usher ‘Seed and Sow’

It’s seven o’ clock

On the dot

I’m in my garden plot

Amongst all the greens – oh yeah

I gotta real pretty – pretty little Daisy growing so close to me

My gardener pulls up

All of the weeds,

Finally breathing deep, no longer suffocating

I got plans to pollinate some seeds, yeah

Across the greater CLE,

Daisy, you know I’m a fiend.


Let me spread my seed, there ain’t no need to buy it

Hoping all the bee swoop in on this brush (baby)

I just want to fertilize and grow

That gardener planted these seeds so long (ago)

Weeding beds until the sun comes up, Daisy

I just want all my seeds to grow.

Friends and Food

IMG_4606This little bowl is a snapshot of all the good people and their influential gifts in my life.

This little bowl is:

Walking through Tokyo to the Fish Market with Mom.

Eating ramen lunch with Nicole and Jason in NYC.

Plated in a bowl from Rachael in France, in a homemade bowl from Tanzania

Plated with hippie noodles and homemade broth.

With turkey grown raised by Mark in Peninsula.

Topped with homemade kimchi inspired by John V. in Portland

Garnished with leftover cilantro from Jackie.

Filled with seasonings inspired by Morocco and India

Eaten with real Chinese chopsticks from Mario

On a counter from Jillian

So when I feel like I have nothing great to live for and I am stagnant and living out more regret than purpose, I can turn to this bowl and this moment and know how fortunate I have it. Gratitude and grace is the greatest of foods.


To the tune of: Pharell Williams; ‘Happy’

Woke up hungover on a Monday
Sunshine’s blinding me on this highway
Feeling pretty nauseous and I have the shakes
Last night I felt 20 years old, today 68

Must find coffee
Rude wake up call, guess I’m not bulletproof
Seriously, coffee
Definitely not feeling like I want to raise the roof (ever…again)
Hazelnut or toffee
Can’t call off on a Monday, people will know the spoof
Black or frappe
I don’t care, I just don’t wanna puke

Here comes my boss and he wants to chat
Asking what I did last night; party at a frat?
Can we meet at 10; better not decline
Something about a rewrite, and a redesign

Still need my coffee…
My credit card statement shows all the truth
Thank God for coffee
Last night’s tab had too many 80 proofs
Maybe bulletproof coffee?
Better straighten out, don’t wanna end up workin the tollbooth
Ghee in my coffee

No more, dancing on the town
Must bring my credit card statement down
Next time I’ll be leaving before the sundown
And I gotta stop drinking Crown
I said no more Crown
Save up for that ball gown
And best to avoid Germantown
Yeah, no more Germantown

Finally got my coffee
Clap along if you feel like raising the roof
Extra caffeinated coffee
Man, feeling great, now I know I’m bulletproof
Awake and happy
Look who’s winning, just needed that extra oomph
Because of coffee
Coffee, coffee, coffee…..


The wind is special.
It pushes and it pulls.
The wind can be uplifting as much as it can tear down.
It hydrates and it dehydrates.
The wind brings reprieve from heat, the wind brings despair in cold.
It sends symphonies and it carries warnings.
The wind broadcasts laughter and echoes tears.
It parallels the land, and is perpendicular to gravity.
The wind spreads seeds of life, and clears aging infrastructure.
It’s always there, yet never there.
That’s why the wind is so special

The Fresh Plants of CLEAir

To the tune of: ‘The Fresh Prince of Belair’ opening theme song

On the south of Detroit Avenue grown and braised
Near the compost is where I spent most of my days
Planted out back’in, the beds so full, all shootin’ some stalks outside where it’s cool
When a couple of weeds who were up to no good started taking over all the planted ‘goods.
Threw down some organic weed killer and Mother Earth got scared, she said your using cayenne pepper but there is still so much pollution in the ‘air.

Baby Collard Greens

To the tune of: Nelly; ‘Apple Bottom Jeans’

Baby collard greens
Roots in the dirt (in the dirt)
Even Popeye eats it for dessert (hey!)
It’ll help you grow (help you grow)
got those minerals-rals-rals-rals

I Will Survive with Swine

To the tune of: Gloria Gaynor; ‘I Will Survive’

At first I was afraid
I was petrified
Kept thinking I could never make a rhyme
worthy of a free food bribe
But then I spent so many nights
dreaming about P2M pulled pork,
And I grew strong
And I learned how Google songs,
and so swine’s back
with the freshest taste
I just ordered some online
and it just showed up at my place
I should have not saved my credit card details
I should have not checked the menu each week
If I had known for just one second
I’d become addicted to Paleo 2 Me

Go on now go and order some more
just hit refresh, babe
’cause there are more meals to explore,
Who was the one who keeps raving about the Thai
oh, no not the Paleo cookie crumble,
Why can’t they just deliver overnight?
Oh no, not thighs
Not Moroccan spiced chicken thighs
oh as long this website’s live
I know I’m gonna thrive
There are just too many choices,
There is just too much to try
and so I’ll buy
I’ll buy the roasted swine (hey hey)

Lorde’s London Broil

To the tune of: Lorde ‘Royals’

I’ve never tasted better marbling in the flesh
I cut my teeth on wedding soup and the hors d’oeuvres
And I’m not going to make a huge mess
Using up paper towels, no napkins for me

But every meals like:
Roasted beets
Glazed goose
Sausage stuffed mushrooms
Hearty grains
gravy’s brown
eating it all to consume

We don’t care, we’re wearing spandex in our seats

But everybody’s like:
Cookin’ with some pork grease
seared brains
salad is fresh caprice

We’re prepared, we want the steaks served medium rare

And we’ll order london broils (broils)
With a side of Au jus just, fancy blood
That kind of cut ain’t too tough, we grill it til it’s well done
Drinks served from a cooler (cooler)
My I can’t believe I’m this thirsty
And baby I’ll drool, I’ll drool I’ll drool
All the sides are complimentary