This is L-A-(kewood).

This ain’t no greenhouse
It ain’t no grocery store either
This is L-A-(kewood)

“All I wanna do is have a little sun before I die,”
Says the plant growing next to the patio chair
It’s all tomatoes
Oh no potatoes
He says heirloom, but I’m sure
He’s golden, or cherry, or big boy, and hybrid
Tomatoes’ plain versatile with greens
And I wonder how much salsa I can make when the whole field is ripe

I spread diatomaceous earth at noon on Tuesday/ Out of a bag that turns everything powder white
The good people of the garden center are proposing I use this / As best they should because it works

The garden beds are packed with turnips and tulips
Back to the wood fence and the front yard too
Well, it’s nothing but feeding me, cause

All I wanna do is get some sun
I got a green thumb, Tricia’s a black one
All I wanna do is have some sun
Until the crop ripens up in the western jungle that is the backyard

Call Me A Fisherlady

To the tune of: Carly Rae Jepsen; ‘Call Me Maybe’

I threw a dish in the sink
Oh no it broke, what will Jillian think?
You looked at me as I yelled
And now the sink’s dirtaay

I wouldn’t trade my soul for that dish
Lets buy new plates from some Amish
Thank god I ate all that crayfish
That we fished from the bay.

Our anchor was holding
Fish lines, waves a blowing
Summer sun, surf was going
Engine died, where are those paddles, baby?

Hey I just caught you
And this is crazy
Hook line and sinker
Bring fish home for dinner, maybe

All the other boats
tried to sink me
But here’s my net of fish
Lets get to shore, but do it safely